Fraud

You’re a fraud.

“Excuse me?”

What? You thought I’d never say it?

Did you think that I lacked the courage or that I couldn’t see it?

It’s so evident it’s borderline embarrassing.

You ask, “How are you?” one moment, the say “Goodbye!” the next.

Before I even got to say a word.

What response did you expect when you couldn’t share one breath?

You’re “busy”.

LOL.

I absolutely get it.

The most important thing in this world is time.

Who you devote it to might as well be your bride.

I love that excuse, as if you think that a year from now you’ll be less busy.

Think about that for a moment.

Excuse me… where was I? Oh, that’s right.

You smile as you listen to my stories – actually that’s false!

To listen you must hear and when we speak you’re clearly a world away.

Your smile’s as thin as a razor, cutting up my soul… maybe… if I still had one.

Be upfront next time.

As we said before, what matters most in this world is time, so please don’t waste mine.

Don’t say “hello” if all you’re thinking is goodbye.

“I was trying to be nice.”

Nice try. That’s a lie…

And you’re a fraud.

You’re “worried” about me you say? Don’t be.

I’ll be totally fine when you’re gone.

How do I know?

Well… that’s because all along, I’ve been a fraud too.

Inspired by Words of Radiance – Brandon Sanderson.

#lies #Sadeas

6 Degrees of Separation

Sticking to song titles this is one of my favourite songs by one of my favourite bands: The Script. When you are separated from something or someone you love deeply you may undergo some of these symptoms, more than aptly described by this talented group of artists.

 

“First, you think the worst is a broken heart.”

True line I believe. I think everyone has a different timeframe before it suddenly hits. You’re no longer tied to that person but your emotions – your heart – disagree. That hurts: what’s worse is you think it’s the worst part but it’s not.

 
What’s gonna kill you is the second part.”

The song never does state what the “second part” is. Unfortunately (or should I say fortunately) I don’t have enough first-hand experience to write from first person viewpoint but I can try assume what this is. It’s probably the memories of all the good things done together rushing through one’s head… and the realisation that it all came to nought.

 
“And the third, is when your world splits down the middle.”

You see them at every turn. They are in your mind’s eye the whole time and like some kind of stubborn cancer their memory just won’t go away; even when you try the not-so-chemo-therapy from friends and family.

 
“And fourth, you’re gonna think that you fixed yourself.”

“I’m fine now. I’m ok. I’m better off without them.”

You say it once, twice. Maybe you even start to believe it.

 
“Fifth, you see them out with someone else.”

How can they move on so quickly? Don’t they feel what you feel? You dread to ask but have to nonetheless:

“Was it… was it ever real?”

 
“And the sixth, is when you admit that you may have messed up a little.”

“I wish I’d never…”

Both regret and acceptance.  The ache remains but the separation should be complete.

PS I really enjoy listening to this song and would suggest you give it a listen, preferably the clean version because the original does have a word or two you wouldn’t want to hear a toddler saying.