Principle of (Personal) Release

Warning the following content is overwhelmingly good news. Proceed with caution.


To give this message some context for a long time I’ve had random moments where an event from the past, recent or otherwise, will just bubble up from some dark corner and come to the forefront. I would find myself reliving an embarrassing moment or dumb, hurtful statement spoken or decision made. The feelings that accompanied that experience would hit anew, fresh as if it were a ten-second old incident. It would be a very random occurrence too, doing some mindless task like washing the dishes or taking out the trash. I believe that’s evidence of undealt with baggage. Maybe it’s not, but below is an advisory antidote.


Dr Edwin Louis Cole, the late pioneer of the men movement in the USA, popularised a biblical truism which will be the basis of this, our conclusion in the Vulnerability series. 

“The sins you forgive are released, and the sins you don’t forgive are retained in your life. If you forgive, you release. By not forgiving, you retain. So simple. So profound. So divine. So true.”

I’ve known that phrase for a while. I know for a fact I haven’t applied it consistently but there has been some concerted effort on my part. One area I totally spaced out on was on the aspect of self-forgiveness. The very concept eluded me for its sheer alienness. “Forgive… myself? What drugs are you on gancho?” From that Christian worldview – where the wonderful, too-good-to-be-true news of Jesus paying the ultimate price and taking the punishment for my own wrongdoing so I can be reconciled with the Father by believing in Him – it was more than a little difficult to ingrain the idea of the wrong party being the one to also dole out forgiveness. 

“I did the wrong but I forgive you.” It sounds absolutely absurd – except it isn’t. If you’ve been following this blog for a while you’ve probably encountered the powerful speech tool “I am”. If not you’ll want to check it out here: Self-Esteem Building Hacks

We’ve talked about being vulnerable with others and being real. Can we take that step to be real with ourselves too?

Ok, so maybe it’s starting to make sense. Maybe I can buy into forgiving myself for foolish decisions I’ve made in the past, releasing the thing that I’ve actively tried to bury deep in my heart… but, how? How do I do that? I’ll take a leaf from a page a friend of mine shared with me just this Friday. It sounded corny. I almost didn’t do it. Almost – but it worked for me. I trust it will for you too.

The Process:

Look yourself in the mirror.

Hold your stomach.

Take a deep breath.

Then talk.

Say your name aloud, affirm that life is a journey where you make mistakes and learn from them.

Say I forgive you *insert your name here* for the bad decisions you made.

Now it’s time to stand up and walk.

And then address the thought of regret.

Whenever it jumps up again say scripture. (If you don’t know any appropriate one I would suggest looking up “verses about forgiveness and being made new”)


That’s it. You can breathe out now and walk tall and free. Thanks for reading. We’ll be jumping into habit formation on Thursday.

Image Source: Heart Shaped Lock

 

Meek Means Freedom

The meek shall inherit the Earth.

The quiet and gentle nature of those who are meek has been portrayed as weakness in this age. We have this not-so-hidden obsession to appear tough and overly confident – it’s what we are instructed to be by what we see on television and read in books. Vulnerability is frowned upon, almost taboo at times. We are led to believe that to embrace our freedom of expression and blast out whatever we want to say is right because that’s what liberty is – isn’t it? When I proclaim my opinion because “I know I’m right and if you disagree then that’s your wrong opinion” am I not doing right by those that gave me a voice? LOL. Check this out:

“Have you heard of the phrase “Empty vessels make the most noise”? It’s a proverb that means that those with the least talent and knowledge usually speak the most, speak the loudest, and create the most fuss — whatever makes their presence felt the most.”

By: https://personalexcellence.co/blog/empty-vessels/

The rest of the post is pretty outstanding too, I highly recommend you check it out.

Being meek is the opposite of the above. Meekness means you are willing to be quiet and listen sometimes. It means you are willing to be corrected and acknowledge that you don’t know everything. If you didn’t know it, believe it or not, you don’t know everything! Neither do I! The beauty of admitting this fact and laying down your pride is it puts you in the most optimal position for growth. You create a barrier to learning whenever you believe you know the wisdom or knowledge someone wants to impart before they even open their mouth. Pride incarcerates. It makes you unwilling to reach out for help when you need it. Every solution needs to come from self and I’m afraid unless you’re God, that isn’t happening. When you are prideful you are confined to the prison of what you know, unable to expand past the perimeter of your skull… but if you’re meek… if you’re meek you’re free.

Stay tuned for the conclusion to our Individuality series tomorrow: The Pit.