23 October

Morocco and Saudi sure made something special.

Unlike this rap, which is audible ether.

You on the other hand are a lyrical miracle.

“Pew pew” is the start, “pew pew” ain’t your pinnacle.

“I ain’t got friends.” That’s what you said.

Perhaps that’s true and my name’s Jed.

Honestly though, you really don’t got homies.

Just an army devoted to you – your very own cronies.

What else ends with -onies?

Uhm… Pink plumed ponies!

Even if they’re beaten and they’re gory and red.

Your enemies better run scared.

Coz at the flip of a switch they’ll be right there.

Except for me… I’ll prolly be late.

But don’t sweat it, I’ll bring a machete.

Or come swinging my Helicopter Richard tiny though it may be.

This is my blessing to you on this day.

It won’t be deep… But it’ll prolly be gay.

Your star sign’s Success.

You’re failure’s biggest nightmare.

Dream to infinity and beyond,

Cause you’re A Baz Lightyear.