Gratitude

Where does one even begin?

Mom you are a blessing,

One that brings joy without sorrow.

You are a brilliant beacon that illuminates my life.

You are like the sun,

Warm, providing insight and life-giving.

The work you do is thankless but you do it anyway.

You are vital but you don’t expect payment in return.

You radiate love even when I don’t reciprocate it.

How can I not love the Lord when you are in my life?

 

You’ve steered me in the right direction from birth.

Before my birth you displayed great wisdom.

You took care of yourself, preserving my future mother.

You spoke into my life, with God you forged a great destiny.

You prayed for me – saving me from premature death countless times.

You shared your wisdom without cost.

When I didn’t listen you chastened me,

Showing me true love in the process.

Any parts of me that are desirable, you had a hand in forging.

You raised me up in the way that I should go,

If I depart from it, it won’t be your fault…

But worry not, you’ve done that good a job.

 

I have seen you do things that astound me time and time again.

You would work while sick for me.

You would make every effort to give me comfort,

Even at the expense of your own comfort.

You carried me like I wasn’t a heavy burden when…

Let’s face it – I was heavy from birth.

You pampered me when you had little.

You didn’t stop when you gained more.

You made every effort to make sure I had the tools required,

To achieve my dreams.

For that I will be forever grateful.

 

However…
I celebrate you more for your person.

For your unflinching honesty.

For your evident dedication to God.

For your tough love.
For you gentle affection.

For ever striving to improve yourself.

For acknowledging mistakes.

For being a true superwoman – with the humility of one far less.

Sometimes your words are pompous,

But your actions!

They drip humility.

You are a wonderful teacher.

Even when I make “the face” I am still learning.

When I don’t agree I often reflect and think:

“That woman was right.”

You are God sent.
Rejoice!

The things you have deposited in me shall impact the world.

Rejoice!

Your story is just beginning.

You shall be esteemed as only a woman after God’s own heart can.

Rejoice!

From you there is much more to come.

Your personal story doesn’t end any time soon.

You’re just at the starting line,

And I for one am excited to see you flourish as you ought to.

I love you deeply,

I’ll try to convey some of that (because I’m not good enough to convey all of that)

But I do and I wish for you to be full of love, joy and peace,

All the days of your life, you gentle soul.

God bless you.

I thank God for you.

 

Happy birthday Mom.

❤️

 

Penpal

Dear God,

So lately I’ve been looking around at the world you created and I’ve got a bone to pick with you. What’s with all this poverty and death? Why did my grandfather get sick and die under your watch? Why do babies die in their mothers’ wombs? What’s up with accidents and global warming and wars where people who don’t even pick a side suffer? What about global catastrophes? Cyclone Idai? Haiti? If you’re so all-powerful and all-loving and ever-present and know the future why do you let this all happen? Are you just plain sadistic?

Yeah I’m pissed but most of all I want answers. Give them to me will you?

Thanks,

Joe


 

Dear Son,

Where do I even begin? My love for you and all the earth knows no bounds. I created you so that I could love you. I made the earth for you – everything I made was good. I AM good. Nothing outside of me is good. Therefore I designed you all for fellowship and relationship with me.

What do you think of slavery my son? You abhor it don’t you? So do I. Consider this, how can there be love without a choice? So I gave you and all mankind free will. With all my power and all my love I am faithful to my word and will not go against this one thing, your choice. I love you so much I give you a choice everyday, life or death, Me or death. “Choose life!” I shout from the heavens and to your heart, but I won’t force you, you get to choose. I gave you dominion over the earth. I won’t act without your say so, not because I have no power, power I have, but I have given you all the authority. I will not subvert it by acting without your permission. I AM faithful to my Word, how else would you trust Me? I even sent My most beloved Son, whom I love more than anything to die, for you! To restore the broken relationship between us. To usher in a better world than the corrupt one that exists now. He came with two instructions that let you know my heart:

  1. Love me with all your mind, soul, heart and strength.
  2. Love your neighbour as your love yourself.

Would you be complaining if this blueprint of living life my way were followed?

I made the earth and everything in it was good. When I made man it became very good. My plan is to make it even better. Lean on Me, trust not in your understanding and I will make your path straight. It’s ok to be mad but in due time you’ll see that no one loves you more than I do, and no one ever will. A life without Me was never my intention. Each day I call to you so that you choose life and life in abundance. That you choose Me.

PS If you find time please read the rest of my letters where I speak in depth of my love for you. I’ve compiled them in a book I’m sure you’ve heard of.

God.

Backwards

Backwards read be should too piece this perhaps.

Backwards move ourselves let we do why?

Progress make to try least at or forward-thinking be always to better it isn’t?

Future our brighten or them rectify to how not, mistakes past about think always we.

Backwards so nature human is why?

Backwards read be should too piece this perhaps.

Zea Mays Everta

Zea Mays Everta from ‘Bleeding Heart’

photo cred: 4USkY

Oh snap! This is it!

This is what we were made for.

We grew up whispering about this day,

Our sheaves touching as the wind blew south.

Surely it’s only upwards from here.

We deserve this treatment.

The thirst we felt as they starved us of water,

The pressure we felt as they packed us like sardines in the silo;

Crushing our relatives in the process…

This is what it was all for.

Now, like the kings of old, we bathe in olive oil, finally free as birds in the sky.

The very same birds that used to torment us and murder us at will.

Hah!

This metallic sky is far better than the one that they call home,

Offering us protection from them and the scorching sun as well.

The building too is ridiculously clean,

Shining like the finest silver as far as the eye can see.

I am clearly not the only one overwhelmed with joy,

I can overhear my cousins hissing with excitement!

It’s blissfully warm in here.

Some sections of the oil pool have become a jacuzzi.

The hissing elation escalates.

I’ve never seen such enthusiasm!

I too end up hissing uncontrollably.

Hahahahah! What is happening?

POP!

Building Confidence Is A Process!

The one last thing I would like to give you regarding building confidence is the knowledge that like most important things, it takes time. It is a process by which you improve daily. There will come a time when your confidence reaches optimal levels where your performance peaks. It is critical to continue doing whatever it is you have been doing up to that point or else one may end up erring to the side of overconfidence which hampers performance as much as having a low self-esteem.

Just because you aren’t instantly confident after the tools and information you have absorbed, don’t panic, you’ll make it, just keep at it. Building confidence is a work in progress!

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If you fall just make sure you get back up.

This concludes the Confidence series. As I continue to add more notes and research to my upcoming Positivity and Academic Excellence series I will use this time to share and hone some of my creative writing skills.

Self-Esteem Building Hacks

There are two tools that I have found to be incredibly effective when it comes to building self-esteem: I AM… and Mack On The Mirror.

I AM…

I AM

This is practically positive affirmations but in every area of life, where we attempt to weed out the phrases “I cannot” and “I am not” because they often lead to a negative answer that limits our vision and our capabilities. Instead we focus on saying “I AM…”

Fill in the missing space with what you believe you are and more importantly what you are working towards!

e.g. I AM Strong. I AM Intelligent. I AM Wise. I AM Confident. I AM Attractive. I AM Focussed…

Mack On The Mirror

My personal favourite. Mack is a slang term I and others used in high school and it means to court. Perhaps we don’t have anyone to speak positively in our lives or to affirm us. Worry not – all we need is a mirror and a mouth. This is effective in that as you use the I AM tool you also see an image speaking the same words back to you. It’s no longer just hearing the words but a visual representation of someone saying those same words back to you invokes a sense of agreement and support, making each of your statements more believable than the last time. The more you do it, the more you believe it. Look at this baby. I don’t know about you but I think she/he can conquer the world.

 

Mack On The Mirror

Physical Side Of Confidence

There are 5 areas that we can attend to by changing some of the things we do physically. Doing so will help us build our self-confidence overall. These five areas are:

  • Exercise
  • Dress
  • Smiling
  • Posture
  • Speech

Exercise

Pretty straightforward. I am sure you’ve heard it before. Recommended 20 min of exercise daily. Once you start it’s easy to maintain. The hard part is starting. Go with an enormous incentive for actually starting and you’ll find that you will.

Exercise will let you know the limits you can take your body and brings that sense of achievement once you reach a particular milestone. It helps shape your body and if done right can help you achieve the look you want.

I feel much more confident now than before I could run without stopping to walk after 5 min.

Dress

First impressions are often dependent on attire. If someone is dressed well the way people treat them reflects that. Same if someone is dressed poorly. Once someone steps on a stage for example you have an opinion of them even before they’ve said a word. Why?

Smiling

You can help fool yourself into feeling confident by doing this. It’s also a sign that you know what you are doing or are comfortable with the results. Try it more often and see it work wonders in your social interactions and your self-perception.

Posture

I was a tall kid. I tried desperately to fit in with those much shorter than me by hunching down for several years. I’ve had to work to recorrect my posture because I belatedly realised that I was tall and there was absolutely nothing wring with that. In fact if I was to define my self-worth using others’ opinion there is actually greater stock placed on being tall than on being short. Still – that’s not what we are aiming for here. Stand up straight. You’ll feel more powerful and confident by doing so.

Speech

Speaking to quickly is a sign of nervousness. It also makes it harder for those listening to process what you are saying. If you speak to slowly however it is easy for someone to then forget what the original point was about by the time you complete your sentence. Volume matters but too much volume can be just as bad – it makes it seem like you’re an attention-seeker aka unconfident.

Work on these 5 key areas and you will see massive positive change in your confidence.

Photo cred: telegraph.co.uk